Forgetting is to Remember
by Ice-Phoenix-chan
Summary: Brendan, the only one May lived for has suicided. It is deja vu of the time her family died, she goes into great depression and wants to be with them, but that time, Brendan was there to save her. Can she be saved again? [one shot Hoennshipy


**Forgetting is to Remember  
By: Ice-Phoenix-chan  
**

"'Why?' a brunette asked her self. 'Why did you have to leave me?' more tears slid down her already stained face as she climbed up the stairs of the same building he did several months ago 'Why?' she questioned."

Brendan, the only one May lived forhad suicided. It is deja vu of the time her family died, she goes into great depression and wants to be with them, but that time, Brendan was there to save her. Can she be saved again? one shot Hoennshipping and slight Hoennchampionshipping

Me no own Pokemon or the poem "Remember" by Christina Rossetti

**WARNING:** A lot of bad stuff here… Character deaths, dark themes (meaning suicide and/or attempt of suicide), drug usage, some adult themes and it's a bit gory, this is really only in the beginning. DO **NOT** READ IF YOU'RE ALREADY' SAD', **I'M SERIOUS!** :doesn't want to entice anyone: .

* * *

By the way, THIS IS** NOT** ABOUT ME! 

May: - .-;; sure…

. It's not!

Brendan: I've called the mental hospital! They're coming to get her!

May: D Yay!

.-;; What are muses good for?

May & Brendan:celebrates:

T.T

* * *

'Why?' a brunette asked her self. 'Why did you have to leave me?' more tears slid down her already stained face as she climbed up the stairs of the same building he did several months ago 'Why?' she questioned.

* * *

Several months ago, they had found a body of a white haired boy on the street with a sea of his blood drenching his clothes and body. She remembered that day vividly, she was merrily walking home along the shores of route 104 when her pokenav rung and brought her the news. Hearing the news that her boyfriend was dead, she quickly flew to Slateport, where his accident happened. With her own eyes, she saw his body. 

A witness said that the boy had jumped off the nearby building, and on his once thought to be optimistic face lay upon a content smile and in his hand clutched a small box, which had been took away by the experts to examine.

A few weeks later, they gave it back. The box contained a diamond ring, and it hand "Mrs. B. M-Birch" and beside it, "Remember" engraved in it. She didn't know what the 'Remember' part meant but the ring confused her. If he wanted her to become Mrs. Brendan Maple-Birch, while did he leave her?

It had only been a month since the new champion's name had been carved into the Records of the Champions but his name will be imprinted in his gravestone instead, where his crimson eyes will laugh and his lips flood her ears with those three words no more.

The news of the dead champion quickly, within a day, the whole Hoenn region had heard the news. Whenever the brunette walked down the streets, the people who recognize her tell her that they feel sorry for her and they will try to help her if they can, but those words only dug into her heart deeper, great help they were, she was reminded about Brendan every day, non-stop, 24/7. She would cry herself to sleep every night, trying to erase the memories of her love, though she knew they weren't removable. Her memories had betrayed her, whenever she thinks of the happy times they had together, they would only turn into a knife and rob a chunk of her heart and make her eyes swell up with tears.

It was like déjà vu, she had the same feeling as she did after her parents died. So she did what she did before, she restarted slitting her wrist, the almost healed scars reopened again. Everyday, she would take a knife and guide it across her wrist and watch the red liquid tickle out of the narrow opening. Yes, that liquid, that traitorous liquid. It decides a person's fate, whether they like it or not. The same fluid lets you live, but it also is like the sickle, it takes your life away when you spill it … just as her sweetheart did.

After a while, the wrist slitting wasn't enough to comfort her and she revived her drug addiction… Sure, she learned in school that they weren't good for her but who cares? It's not like she didn't do it before. There isn't anyone that cares, so what's the difference? After her parents died, Brendan was the only one there for her, but he's gone now.

She often drank dangerous amounts of alcohol, mixed in with other drugs at raves. The last thing she would remember is passing out at the party but every morning, she would find her self back home, untouched. She sometimes, she would wake up wondering how she got home and if she was really 'untouched'.

* * *

One morning, she found a note in her mail box; it read "You should really stop with the drugs! You're going to die within a few months if you keep this up!" 

'How did this person know I was doing drugs?' A thought came into her head, 'W-was it Brendan who wrote it?' She asked herself 'No, it can't be... he's dead…' She debated with herself 'but the handwriting of this seems like that it was written by Brendan…' She scrutinized the note, but her vision remained blurry 'W-why can't I se properly! She asked herself 'May, your on drugs, you moron! Of course you can't see properly!' the thought answered. 'I wonder who sent it…'

* * *

She ignored the note and continued her addiction of drugs. 'After all,' she thought, 'No one will care if I die,' so, the custom of her passing out at the parties and being brought back home was continued. One night, she awoke on her couch and saw the figure of the man who brought her back exiting her house. 

"H-hey," she called to him.

He stopped in his tracks, "Yes?" He asked.

"A-are you the one that brought me home every night?"

He nodded.

"D-did you send the letter?"

He nodded again. "You really should stop taking all those garbage," he told her

She squinted. She didn't know if the drugs were taking effect or not but she saw white hair and ruby eyes on the man. Brendan…?

"B-Brendan?" She asked. "Brendan? Is that you?" She asked as she ran and wrapped her arms around him. "Brendan! It's really you!" she whispered.

He turned around and opened his mouth to say but he was interrupted by a passionate kiss from the brunette. He quickly pulled away. "No, I'm not Brendan," He answered.

"Yes you are!" She cried, "You've already left me once! Are you gonna… gonna… leave…" She felt tears rolling down her cheeks, "leave me… again?" She burst into tears.

"Really, I'm not Brendan!" He replied.

"Yes you are!" She said through her tears, "Quit lying to me!"

"But I'm seriously not Brendan!" He answered.

May ignored his answer "Can't you just pretend to be? Please! Just this once! Just once kiss!" She said.

The man sighed and solemnly nodded his head. With his consent, the brunette pressed her lips against his. The brunette began to slip her tongue into his mouth but as soon as it reached, the man pulled away and straightened himself. "I should go now," he said in an uncertain and a hint of guilt in his voice and left.

The girl's fingertips traced her lips "Brendan…"

* * *

Her depression became so heavy that it even the effects of the drugs couldn't lift her back up, but her drug addiction continued to deepen until she couldn't take her life anymore. She was ready to end it. 

'Why?' a brunette asked her self. 'Why did you have to leave me?' more tears slid down her already stained face as she climbed up the stairs of the same building he did a several months ago 'Why?' she asked again. The only answer she got was the echoing of her footsteps through the stairwell walls.

She walked out to the roof of this death stage and took a deep breath. "Good bye," She said, though there wasn't anyone cared. She sighed and closed her eyes. "Wait for me, Brendan" she said and stepped off the ledge of the building.

She waited for the wind to rush against her face and the platform of mortality, the one that lives spring from and where the dead are buried, but no wind came. All the motion stopped. She felt her body against the building, a lot of weight at sustained on her right hand. She looked above to see a yellow-blue gloved hand holding her's.

"Let go!" She whined but the hand was stationary, it didn't move at all. "I said let go!" She protested. Instead, it started to pull her up. _Wait… aren't those Brendan's gloves?_ She asked herself. As soon as she got back on her feet, the gloved hand was gone.

"B-Brendan?" she called. There was no reply, only a gently breeze swayed with her hair. Suddenly, she felt pressure gently on side of her head adjusting her bandana, after it played with her cheeks… like the way Brendan did.

"B-Bread Head?" she asked. Though she couldn't see anyone, she wrapped her arms around to feel if the 'pressure' was Brendan. Surprisingly, she felt a warm 'body', which was embracing her back. "Are you Brendan?" she asked.

"Are you Yam?" his voice answered.

"B-boy! It's you! I thought you left me!"

"I'm right here, and always will be, like I promised" she heard his voice faintly whisper in her ear.

"I miss you," she said, burying her head on his shoulder.

"Me too,"

Silvery tears formed on her cheeks

"I need to go now," The warmth around her body cooled. She felt a soft kiss on her cheek.

"No!" She tried to get a hold of his body, but this time, she felt no body.

"Brendan Birch! Come back here!"

A soft chuckle came through the wind. "May-ple, you'll do fine without me!"

"No I won't! I- you- I-I'll jump again!"

Another mockingly chuckle reached her ears "Bye! I love you!" The voice faded word by word from the wind.

Her tears formed again "F-fine! If you're not coming back, I'll go to you!"

She stood up on the railing of the building again and closed her eyes. 'Wait for me,' she thought, 'I'm coming'

Again, she stride off the building, expecting to feel the wind rush against her face this time but yet again, she was saved, this time, gloveless. She groaned.

"Yam, what are you doing?" A mature voice that belonged to the man asked.

Surprised, she opened her eyes. 'Yam? Only Brendan called me Yam! … That's not his voice though!'

She tried to struggle out of his iron grip but his strong arms easily pulled her fatigue body to safety.

Tears spilled out of her eyes. "Why can't you let me die?" she cried, still struggling out of his iron grip.

"Brendan told me to save you if anything happens," He replied.

She stopped and turned to the blue haired man. "H-he… did?" her words slowly tripped out of her lips.

The man nodded "And he told me to give this to you, Yam" He said, handing her a perfectly straight, white envelope that read 'To Yam' and started to leave.

"Hey, did Brendan say that my name was Yam?" She asked

With a puzzled look on his face, the man turned around and nodded.

"My real name is May, Brendan's girlfriend, as you already know." she said, sticking out her hand to shake, "Nice to meet you,"

"Steven, Brendan's friend, also current Champion of the Hoenn League since…" He quickly stopped himself, realizing what he was saying. "Sorry for re-"

"It's okay," the brunette answered with a small smile. The blue haired man opened the door to the stairwell. As he was about to close the door, he suddenly stopped and turned around. "Brendan was lucky to have such an amazing girlfriend," he said and closed the door behind him.

May's cheeks turned crimson and she opened Brendan's letter

* * *

_Hey, Yam!_

_Steven is a nice guy, isn't he? I've asked him to stop you from doing anything silly P you know, you two would look pretty cute together (but we look even cuter!). As I said before, he is a great guy, I wouldn't mind if you two go out… as long as you're happy and OF COURSE, you WON'T forget me, will ya'? (Hey, Steven is infinity times better than Wall leak!)_

_Okay, let's have some serious talk now. I'm really sorry I left you. I just… just couldn't handle the pressure anymore! It was driving me crazy! I didn't mean to hurt you but my decision was thought over many times. The only thing I regret about my decision is leaving you behind… I don't want you to come with me but I really miss you. I know my decision will hurt you deeply, and it hurts me to see you hurt! But please, please live on! I've enclosed a poem for you; I hope it will encourage you to do so. Remember, I'll always be there for you._

_- Your Bread Head_

_XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO_

_Is that enough?_

_P.S. Hey, YAM:laughs: can't hurt me for doing that now!_

_P.P.S. De-friend wall leak!_

_P.P.P.S. I wuv u:hugs:_

_P.P.P.P.S. REMEMBER TO READ THE POEM!_

_P.P.P.P.P.S. Don't do anything silly!_

_P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Really, think about Steven!_

_P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. By the way, thank Steven; he's the one that cared for you_

_P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. The P.S. below is that last one!_

_P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Whoa! So many P.s in the P.S.!

* * *

_

The brunette fished out another piece of paper in the envelope.

* * *

_Remember_

_Remember me when I am gone away,_

_Gone far away into the silent land;_

_When you can no more hold me by the hand,_

_Nor I half turn to go, yet turning to stay._

_Remember me when no more, day by day,_

_You tell me of our future that you planned:_

_Only remember; you understand_

_It will be late to counsel then or pray._

_Yet if you should forget me for a while_

_And afterwards remember, do not grieve:_

_For if the darkness and corruption leave_

_A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,_

_Better by far you should forget and smile_

_Than that you should remember and be sad._

_-Christina Rossetti

* * *

_

At the bottom of the poem, Brendan's writing appeared again.

* * *

_Please live on. I know you can do it. Remember, if you are sad remember me, _"_Better by far you should forget and smile Than that you should remember and be sad._"

* * *

He quoted from the poem. She smiled and wiped a tear off her cheek. That was the last tear she will spill for him. She stuffed the contents back into its envelope and looked down the building.

"Hey, Steven!" She shouted.

The man's blue eyes shot up to look at her. "Yeah?"

"I would like to say thank you, you're the one who took me home every night, right?"

He looked away in embarrassment "Yeah," he admitted

"Do you want to go for ice cream? My treat as a token of my gratitude." She said.

He shrugged "Sure," He answered.

"'Kay!" She said. She smiled as she ran down the stairs …

* * *

Okay that was sucky… especially the ending :sweatdrops: 

Please review!


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